Why women have affairs?
Chat about a loaded matter that no one wants to talk about, that’s it. Funny thing, extramarital affairs have been going on from millennium. Extramarital relationships can be burdened with problems, cause misery, and other harms. Also you have to wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and frankness thing, money, age dissimilarity, faith education, shame, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I shall define an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, dating married woman.
Why do married people have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are people seeking affairs. I think generally though it is only the human state, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and respected. Here are a several reasons I have run across.
Physically we as human beings are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and fun, and sex makes us get away the world for a brief period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Someone are able to switch the craving on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another being, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos society has erected against married dating. For lots of people the yearnings will beat their fears and make them risk the wrath of not only their family, but society too. So why, what is the means?
Sex Addicts, perhaps some of us are. Sex is awfully pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not harm your spouse or anybody else? You would need to lessen the hazard you are taking. If you have the approach that a good affair is one that is beneficial to everybody, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the biggest group, colossal really. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, except they feel comfy in the manner they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Also there are the kids to look after. Your funds are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay together besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex operation, at least not with their spouse. An marital affair from time to time solves the difficulty while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Neglect, sorrowfully this is a ordinary groung I fear. One or the other, as a rule the man is sexually neglecting his female for a tones of reasons. As a man I truly am grateful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “milfs” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, could be compassion is gone, could be it is the closeness, could be neglect. Could be we have simply developed apart, our general concerns diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is opposite of what you want. Maybe I just don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The first reason people give is, they search for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run away, for financial gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.